I have been experiencing ugly emotions. They are more than just negative, they make me feel the scowling of my soul. There is clearly some anger in me and I am trying to figure out what to do with it. Usually, once I verbalize my emotions they lose their power and I feel free. However, I am just drowning in the ugly right now. I am not sure if verbal expression is enough. I need to make it physical. When I was a child and even a teenager I used to be a bit violent. I used to hit someone (usually a family member - someone I felt would never leave me even though I was being ugly) and throw things (sometimes at a family member but often in the privacy of my room). As I got older I stopped doing this. I felt guilty for what I had done in the past, but I have forgiven myself as have my family members. Now when the ugly comes about I write. I also will run. Both activities clear my head and make me feel whole.